Jalopnik

How To Draw A Volkswagen Beetle With Just Two Ovals [Video]

Jason Torchinsky — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 16:00:00 EST

Today's the 40th anniversary of the 15,007,034th Volkswagen Beetle built — the number needed to surpass the former record holder for most produced car — the Model T. It made the Beetle officially the world's best-selling car. As a way to commemorate this event, and because I have a big, obvious soft spot for old Beetles, I made a little video showing you how anyone can draw a Beetle using just two ovals. More »

How To Drive Fast Without Getting Caught [Video]

Mike Spinelli — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 15:30:00 EST

If you were unaware, Alex Roy and co-driver David Maher crossed the continental U.S. in 31 hours, 4 minutes. They did it in an E39 BMW M5 that had more electronics gear than a twin-engine Cessna. Some have called the two irresponsable. Now, they're coming clean about road-trip safety. More »

Anatomie d’un Depart Is A Silent Movie About A Turbo-Era F1 Race [Video]

Peter Orosz — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 15:00:00 EST

At the 1985 Monaco Grand Prix, the French oil company Elf sponsored a crew to film the drivers and the teams as they readied themselves for the race. The result was Anatomie d’un Depart (“Anatomy of the Start”), ten mostly silent minutes set to a loopy Serge Franklin score, interspersed with the occasional squeak of a racing glove on a visor and some burbly turbos. More »

Why Not Turn Your Honda Into A Bugatti Veyron? [LOLCars]

Matt Hardigree — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 14:30:00 EST

Some brilliant entrepreneur on eBay is offering a fiberglass body kit designed to turn your $1,600 mid-'90s Honda Civic coupe into the $1.6 million Bugatti Veyron for just $4,500. Buy it. Buy it now. You absolutely must. More »

How Not To Lower Your Car [LOLCars]

Raphael Orlove — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 14:00:00 EST

A thread on StanceWorks — the popular forum for lowered and hellaflush cars — began with a proud 2001 Honda Civic owner showing off his trunk-rattling sound system and slammed car. Then forum members quickly discovered how he lowered the car. As you can see, it's the kind of horrific DIY engineering that makes you want to scream, "You're doing it wrong!" More »

This Is The World’s Longest Classified Car Rant [Found On EBay]

Raphael Orlove — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 13:30:00 EST

Orphaned by the conspiracy-laden bankruptcy of British Leyland, the generally-terrible Austin Princess attracts a special kind of old car curmudgeon. That's why seeing this 1,500 word eBay rant about one such car shouldn't surprise anyone. More »

The Impromptu Parking Lot Drift Grand Prix [Video]

Raphael Orlove — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 13:00:00 EST

The moment snow hits the ground, every empty parking lot transforms from a huge concrete patch of nothing into a drifter's paradise. Watch as a sliding Crown Vic draws an SUV and a minivan into some sideways action. More »

Yes, a Yugo Can Be a Wicked Track Machine [Video]

Peter Orosz — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 12:30:00 EST

These are Yugos turned into race cars. Yes, Yugos. Yes, race cars. Raced by Serbians in Serbia, they are proper track cars with roll cages, and the action is positively ferocious. More »

The Dubious Physics Of Nissan's Terrible Truck Ads [Objects In Motion]

Jason Torchinsky — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 12:00:00 EST

Nissan's ad campaign for the Frontier has the pickup engaging in absurd and impossible stunts like snowboarding, dune-riding and catching an airplane wheel in the bed of the truck. The commercials are, in word, terrible. Let's use physics to show you why. More »

What's The Best Russian Dashcam Video? [Video]

Patrick Frawley — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 11:30:00 EST

Concerns about insurance fraud and other unpleasantries are inducing many Russian drivers to mount video cameras on their dashes. In their efforts to protect themselves from exploitation, they've also racked up an incredible archive of near-misses and utter insanity. What's the best Russian dashcam video? More »

The Ten Best Cars For Driving Insane Distances [Answers Of The Day]

Patrick Frawley — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 11:00:00 EST

For some people driving isn't about speed or style; it's about going distances better measured by physics calculations than odometers. These are Jalopnik readers' picks for the best ways to rack up astronomical mileage without stress or excessive cost. More »

These Cars Were Not Destroyed In A Riot [Car Fires]

Raphael Orlove — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 10:00:00 EST

Unlike the thousands of cars burned in Berlin, these cars were not destroyed by pissed youths. They are part of an art installation in Frankfurt meant to evoke and question this image of disorder. More »

Police Can't Stop This 11-Year-Old From Breaking Into Cars [Car Crime]

Raphael Orlove — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 09:30:00 EST

Albany Police stopped a stolen car last Sunday and arrested the driver on felony charges. It was the driver's second felony charge in 15 days. And he's in the fifth grade. More »

2014 Ford Focus RS, A Dodge Barracuda, And Santorum Spreads His Anti-Bailout Message [The Morning Shift]

Ray Wert — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 09:00:00 EST

This is the Morning Shift, our one-stop daily roundup of all the auto news that's actually important — all in one place at 9:00 AM. Or, you could spend all day waiting for other sites to parcel it out to you one story at a time. Isn't your time more important? More »

For $99,000, Hit The RUF [Nice Price Or Crack Pipe]

graverobber — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 08:00:00 EST

Porsche's venerable 911 is lust-worthy on its own, but that hasn't stopped many an tuner from attempting to eke out even more of what the car has to offer. Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe 1986 Carrera coupe has been RUF'd up, but is its price too RUF to handle? More »

Your Ridiculously Cool BMW 1M Wallpaper Is Here [Car Porn]

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 17:15:00 EST

The full name of the BMW 1M is the BMW 1 Seres M Coupe. It's not an exciting name, but it's a fun car and it looks great in white as demonstrated by photographer Scott Chu in this portrait. More »

COTD: Crapware Edition [Commenter Of The Day]

Patrick Frawley — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 17:00:00 EST

We live in the age of your-way-right-away. People expect individualistic whims and demands to be fulfilled immediately. More often then not, that potential problem is solved by giving people everything they could possibly want — and much more — up front as part of the deal. More »

Ken Block Debuts New Line Of Thongs [Video]

Raphael Orlove — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 16:30:00 EST

Titled "Block It Like It's Hot," Ken Block announced a new racy brand of unmentionables in his most recent interview. Block also expressed a love for Amazonian monkeys as well as Christian dubstep house trance fusion jazz. And breasts. More »

Douchebag CEO of Douchebag Company Sends Out Douchebag Press Release Bragging About Being Douchebag [Barrett-jackson]

Jason Torchinsky — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 16:00:00 EST

Let's start with the end result here, just to get that out of the way: a very deserving charity received a lot of money. So far so good. It's the way it all went down that makes you want to retch. More »

Apple Fanboy Thinks Different From Regular Traffic [Video]

Patrick Frawley — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 15:30:00 EST

Apple devotees who openly display their Cupertino affections usually don't get much sympathy. Slow urban traffic is no place for clumsy pushiness. Combine the two and you end up with this puzzling encounter in Russia. More »

Man Gets $20,000 In Tickets For Vanity License Plate [Video]

Patrick Frawley — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 15:00:00 EST

Danny White lives in Washington, DC, is a die-hard Redskins fan, and has both a Chevrolet Avalanche and a peculiar sense of humor. Thanks to a peculiar quirk in the District's Department of Motor Vehicles' computer system, those last two details have gotten him about $20,000 worth of unpaid — and unearned — parking tickets. More »

European Chevy Camaro Gets Cooler LED Tailights [Chevy Camaro]

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 14:30:00 EST

Americans invented the Camaro. Americans invented the lightbulb. Wouldn't it then make sense for Americans to get the Camaro with the best bulbs? Alas, shots of the new European Camaro show they're getting better, more fancy LED lights. Let's set fire to our mullets in protest! More »

How The World's Most Famous Auto Designer Mailed A Concept Car Out Of GM, Piece By Piece [Secret Cars]

Benjamin Preston — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 14:00:00 EST

Henry Ford may have popularized the American car, but it was legendary General Motors Designer Harley Earl who, through his concepts, made it sexy. One example — the Corvette's twin brother, the Oldsmobile F-88 — was so desirable, Earl secretly crated the entire concept car out of GM and shipped it, piece-by-piece, to his friend and former competitor. More »

Yes, You Picked A Bad Place To Park [LOLCars]

Raphael Orlove — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 13:30:00 EST

The shot of this Hyundai Tiburon by Reddit user man_in_the_mirra meeting a sad, icy fate once again shows just how important it is to consider your choice in parking spots carefully. Especially when the temperature drops below freezing. More »

Lexus IS300 From Hell Does Fiery Burnouts [Video]

Raphael Orlove — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 13:00:00 EST

Don't be fooled by the cute heart stickers on the side of this jet black Lexus IS300. It's clearly a beast from below. Look at how it turns tire smoke into flames. More »

The Walk Of Shame Shuttle Now Has A Commercial [Video]

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 12:30:00 EST

Our favorite undergrad entrepreneur now has a commercial for her Walk of Shame shuttle service, although she calls it a "mock commercial" — whatever that means. More »

This Is The Worst School Zone Sign In History [Traffic Signs]

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 12:00:00 EST

School zones serve an obvious and important role in pedestrian safety because no one wants to hit a kid. Zone enforcement usually lasts a few hundred feet over a large chunk of time in the morning and afternoon. This school zone sign in Michigan tries to break up that solid time slot. The result has been hilariously disastrous. More »

What's The Best Car For Driving 200,000 Miles A Year? [Question Of The Day]

Patrick Frawley — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 11:30:00 EST

Yesterday we brought you the tale of a road warrior who has done three times the distance to the moon in about five years. His Civic may be capable, but there are definitely other viable means to racking up incredible mileage. What's the best car for driving about two hundred thousand miles a year? More »

The Ten Worst "High-Performance" Engines Of All Time [Answers Of The Day]

Patrick Frawley — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 11:00:00 EST

A high-performance engine is what makes a fast car a fast car. Except when it doesn't. These are Jalopnik readers' picks for the ten worst "high-performance" engines of all time. More »

Daryl Hannah's Biodiesel El Camino For Sale Again [Star Cars]

Matt Hardigree — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 10:00:00 EST

Back in 2007, I encouraged all of you to rush out and buy Daryl Hannah's biodiesel 1983 El Camino. As I expected, one of you did and has been the proud owner of that vehicle ever since. Now it's time for another Jalopnik reader to inherit the beast. More »

GM's Biggest Profit Ever, Tesla Says 5,000 Model S Sedans This Year, And A Smaller Porsche SUV [The Morning Shift]

Ray Wert — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 09:00:00 EST

For $5,900, Der Kommissar’s In Town, Uh, Uh, Oh [Nice Price Or Crack Pipe]

graverobber — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 08:00:00 EST

Diplomatic immunity means never having to say you're sorry. Today's Nice Price or Crack Pipe Euro-spec Mercedes 300D looks like something a foreign attaché might drive, but will its price tax your diplomacy? More »

Porsche Macan: For Soccer Moms Who Want A Smaller SUV [Video]

Ray Wert — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 07:45:00 EST

Here it is — the smaller-than-a-Cayenne SUV from Porsche that everyone thought would be called the "Cajun." Except instead, it'll be called the Macan — derived from the Indonesian word for "tiger." Funny, doesn't look much like a tiger to us. More »

Unlock Your Car From The Outside With A Shoelace [Video]

Whitson Gordon — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 20:00:00 EST

If you accidentally lock your keys in the car and don't have your wedge and metal rod handy, you can often unlock the car from the outside using nothing but your shoelace. More »

The Art Of Drifting A Nissan GT-R In The Rain [Video]

Mike Spinelli — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 18:41:23 EST

Chris Harris says the 2012 Nissan GT-R is one of the most interesting cars in the world to behave badly in. Why? Because the car's amazingly byzantine all-wheel drivetrain fights against aggressively reckless inputs. But what if you add a dour British rain? Instant four-wheel dorifto. More »

Your Ridiculously Cool Flying Skoda Rally Car Wallpaper Is Here [Car Porn]

Matt Hardigree — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 17:15:00 EST

I don't post a lot of Skoda wallpapers because no one sends them to me, but it is one of my favorite VW Group companies (the Skoda Superb is hot). Why I enjoy it can be summed up in this shot of a Skoda Fabia S2000 flying over a crest at Rally Sweeden, where driver Sebastian Ogier won his class while looking awesome. More »

TSA Agents Singling Out Sexy Women For Multiple Body Scans [Planelopnik]

Erin Gloria Ryan — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 17:10:00 EST

Several women who flew through Dallas/Fort Worth's airport have filed complaints against the TSA claiming that officials asked them to walk through the body scanners multiple times. Why would female agents do such a thing? So the male agents viewing the scans could get a better look at their bodies. Ew. More »

COTD: Tinfoil Hat Edition [Commenter Of The Day]

Patrick Frawley — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 17:00:00 EST

One of the great successes of the Web is the unstoppable propagation of ludicrous conspiracy theories. Used to be that in-jokes like the Church of the SubGenius and the tales cooked up by bored John Birch Society types and the TimeCube had to pass by word of mouth, but now every twelve-year-old knows about all the ways in which that was NOT Osama bin Laden that got killed. More »

This Swiss Satellite Is Like A Roomba For Space [Video]

Patrick Frawley — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 16:30:00 EST

Space junk is a serious if little-appreciated problem. Dead satellites, spent booster rockets, and other orbiting technical garbage place active satellites and manned craft in significant peril. In a culturally appropriate effort, the Swiss Space Center is launching the CleanSpace program to tidy up low-earth orbit. More »