Fleshbot

What Would Fleshbot Readers Do? Hearting Alexis Silver [This Week In Porn Titles]

Gram Ponante — Fri, 16 May 2008 22:30:33 EDT

The title of this movie might be "I Love Alexis Silver," but the box cover photo reveals that Silver might be ambivalent about you.

The question we put to our friends this week is: With that baleful gaze, What Is Alexis Silver Really Thinking? Does she heart us, or does she skull us, or perhaps even "at" symbol, octothorp, and question mark/exclamation point us? Be like last week's winner, bleeble, and set us straight.

· New Sensations (newsensations.com)
· Buy "I Love Alexis Silver" (gamelink.com)

Flashbot Fleshback: The Springtime Of Our Discontent [Week In Review]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 21:00:00 EDT

A look back at the week that was ...

· No matter how you choose to celebrate the month of May, there's no reason masturbation shouldn't be involved.
· So, is it time for our checkup again?
· Sometimes sex just isn't dirty enough. Except when it is.
· We remember when we had a young American body.
· Former glamour models never die ... they just have second thoughts.

· So that's where Randy Spears has been hiding!
· It's a dirty job and we're kind of glad that Ariel X is doing it.
· If we all put our heads together, no porn movie will go unwatched.
· Sometimes it's almost like the people making porn know exactly what we want!
· Remember, you're all winners in our book. Actually, just the guy who won our contest is. The rest of you are tied for second place, though.

Best Of Babelogs: Weekend Edition [Babes]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 20:00:00 EDT

Because these little intros don't write themselves ...

· Alexus Winston (glam0ur.com)
· Audrey Bitoni (bustyandsexy.net)
· Carli Banks (nudebabes.ws)
· Elle (babesdiary.com)
· Evelyn (girlsofdesire.org)
· Justine Joli (babedot.com)
· Luisa (novojoy.com)

· Mackenzie Lee (pmates.com)
· Marilyn (nextdoormania.com)
· Mindy Vega (glamdolls.com)
· Monika (labatidora.net)

· Nancy (hq69.com)
· Nikky (2damnhot.com)
· Natalie Larissa (morazzia.com)
· Natasha (zurf.be)

· Olivia (go-girls-go.com)
· Paloma (babeslog.net)
· Regina (babeskickass.com)
· Sasha (kindgirls.com)
· Tania (freeporn.hu)

* * * * *

Previously: Best of Babelogs Archives

Sex Blog Roundup: Working It Out [Sex Blogs]

Fleshbot — Fri, 16 May 2008 17:20:35 EDT

Tired of getting sand kicked in your face? Can't wait to beat up those neighborhood bullies? Then build your strength with the bloggers in today's roundup of some of our favorite moments from the sex blog scene as they go through the paces of strenuous workouts. Hike until you're too exhausted to think of sex in the woods! Endure orgasms pushed beyond limits! Get tackled on your way to the bedroom! And as you cool down and reward yourself with some locker room antics, remember that these kind of workouts can be just as tough on your mind as they are on your body.

Pump it up with Jefferson after the jump.

. . .

Sex Blog Roundup
by Jefferson

- - -

Weekend Workout

I had just sat down and barely had two sips of water before he pinned me down to the blanket. I was so tired that I couldn't have gotten away if I wanted to. Not that I wanted to get away all.

Feeling his warm body on top of me, feeling him kissing me started to reinvigorate me. His hand sliding up my shorts and into my black cotton panties completely woke me up and I felt like I hadn't hiked miles suddenly. I was ready for some more of his activities.

- Anal Amy

- - -

Learning My Limits, Part Two

He put an arm around me. "Don't stop with the dildo," Phil said. "Keep rubbing that clit." I was on the cusp of another orgasm before the last one fully died away. "Cum again, Penny," Phil said, and it was easy and I did. Phil's hand was on my belly as my yells turned into gasps and then into little mewls and cries. I turned my head to kiss him, but he shook his head. "You're not done yet," he said. "Keep going."

I was still breathing fast. "But my pussy—" I said, between breaths, "is—tired."

- Birds Are Smart

- - -

Camera Phones

One night we are all out at a bar hanging out, taking in the local scene, and he starts flirting with some chick who is there on vacation. She was good looking, there with friends from college, and he starts sweet talking her. While she was up at the bar, he talks about how he hasn't got laid in a while.

He has a girlfriend back home and to make himself feel better, he shoots her a text message saying he misses her. They start a texting war back and forth of naughty, nasty messages. Every time he would get something hot, he would share it with the table.

He then got a picture of his college girlfriend's tits and another of her vagina saying, "I want you inside me."

- A Gay Athlete's Life

- - -

Beautiful Night

I started just with bare hands, touching him all over, and then I got the gloves. I touched every exposed part of his body, except that I left his cock alone (because there is no way to do that softly enough with the gloves). I worked methodically down one side and up the other. And all the while, I watched his face closely, watching for the transitions from pleasure to pain, and backing off if I saw a lip curl. Sometimes I pressed the gloves against him enough to hurt a little, but never much.

- Devastating Yet Inconsequential

- - -

Takers

We propped her right up on the hood of my car in the parking lot of the town library and waited until it closed, when the men would trickle out of it, their eyes all full of paper and dust, and we asked, one by one, if anyone wanted to see her. Most said no, or didn't say anything, people don't see what they don't believe, but it was one man, whose head bent over his PDA like his neck was broken, a skinny kid with long, stringy blonde hair, who didn't even look to see if her hands were tied or not. He simply saw the situation and said "Yes." Martin lifted her shirt above her breasts, just the edges of his nails across the skin of her chest and she breathed like she was making to faint. She spread her legs apart on the hood of the car to keep from falling over.

- In Your Pants

- - -

Turn Over I Want That Ass

Ripping clothes from each other's bodies, I glance up and look at him. Holding my face he kisses me deeply as our pants fall to the floor. We are in my living room and there just isn't enough space on the couch. Well there is, but it's so much easier in my bed. The trail of clothes follows us upstairs with constant groping, grabbing, kissing and biting. I am walking backwards up the stairs and he over powers me to my back.

- Lust Puddle

* * * * *

Thumbnail via The Real Workout (TGP/preview gallery @ paperstreetcash.com, via Ask Jolene)

Previously: Sex Blog Roundup Archive

Flesh Flicks: What's Under (Or On) The Hood? [Hardcore]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 17:05:00 EDT

Look, we're all for fuel-efficiency and designing small, wimpy cars that get 500 miles to the gallon and shoot rainbows out their exhaust pipes. We like Planet Earth too, and want to keep all it green and livable and all that stuff. But we're also red-blooded Americans who appreciate a nice 427 big block V8 that's too loud, too costly, and way too big to be any sort of practical solution to transportation. After all, have you ever tried to fuck in the back seat of a Prius? Not that you could ever pick up a chick in a car that is completely silent when sitting at a traffic light. You can't even peel out properly! If you want to romance the ladies, you need a car with noise and power and a really big hood. Sure, it's bad for the planet, but so is a population that never gets laid.

. . .

· " RedTube - Sex on the Hood of big american Car" (RedTube)

* * * * *

Previously: Flesh Flicks Archives

Give Her A Hand [Celebrity]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 16:28:26 EDT

Just the thought of watching "The Hills" has the same effect on us that watching one of those flashy Japanese cartoons has on epileptic kids, but we're warming up to the idea of watching a show about Audrina Patridge walking around in a bikini. At least one person with a hand agrees. (Click the image for a gallery.)

. . .

Photo: Splash News

Sheyla Hershey holds the Guinness Book of ... [Boobs]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 15:57:54 EDT

Sheyla Hershey holds the Guinness Book of Brazilian World Records (whatever that means) for the largest chest (in the Brazilian World?) But that's not enough! She wants to up the size of her FFF cup implants, but can't find a doctor or legal code willing to pump that much silicone into her body. Not even in Texas! We thought they did everything bigger down there! (myfoxhouston.com)

Teledildonics And You: How One Company Could Control The Future Of Sex [Cybersex]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 14:10:50 EDT

Have you had a orgasm recently? Good for you! Were you helped along with some technical assistance, specifically from a little buzzing friend? Then you probably owe someone money. You see, there's a big little company called Immersion and while we're not sure exactly what they make or build, they do hold pretty much every patent imaginable in the field of haptics or "force feedback" technology (i.e., things that vibrate when you play with them.) That market mostly consists of shaky videogame controllers and teledildonics devices. For example, Immersion has filed and won a lawsuit against Sony that would prevent them from selling their Playstation controllers in the U.S.; it's currently under appeal. Of course, even a company like Immersion doesn't want to get down and dirty with people who make sex toys, so they've licensed their patents that might apply to sexual devices to the mysteriously named Internet Services, LLC—and then let those guys sue sex companies that violate them. If you thought that was confusing, pay attention, because it get weirder ...

After Immersion won its lawsuit against Sony, Internet Services sued them, looking for a cut of the $90 million verdict. But now, halfway through the trial, the lawyer for Internet Services wants off the case and filed a motion to remove himself. So they are now suing him too, in order to force him to stay.

What does all of this have to do with orgasms? Well for starters, if you want to build and sell any sort of vibrating cybersex device, this one company can and probably will sue you for patent infringement unless you license their technology first. (Even a patent lawyer who makes his living doing this stuff doesn't want to work for them anymore, though he won't say why.) If you care about where your next buzz comes from—and who might stand to profit from it—these links might be worth a read.

· Keker & Van Nest wants to get away from client with cybersex patent rights (The Prior Art)
· Who Says Patent Lawsuits Aren't Sexy? (techdirt.com, via gadgets.boingboing.net)
· Immersion vibrates more than your games? (slashdong.org)
· Thumbnail via Slashdong

Pierre Woodman Seeks Perfection, Settles For 34 Hot Naked Women [Hardcore]

DCypher — Fri, 16 May 2008 13:30:38 EDT

Hot on the heels of Anneta Keys' zucchini-wielding performance in "Perfectionist 2", ~~dirty Euro bastard~~ acclaimed porn auteur Pierre Woodman wrapped up his sex thriller series "Perfectionist" recently with a third chapter: he wanted us to tell you that watching his cast perform would "thrill you to the bone" but we absolutely refused, so just forget that you read that. Shot on location in the Czech Republic and Brazil, the series features almost three dozen actresses (including Woodman's contract girls Divinity Love and Nessa Devil), some very Dirk Diggler-esque plot twists involving guns and gangsters that border on sheer ridiculousness, and one very sexy Ferrari 599 GTB. Sadly, pictures of the car were not included in the batch of preview shots from "Perfectionist 3" that was sent to us and which you'll find after the jump.

. . .

"Perfectionist 3" also stars Anetta Keys, Babalu, Divinity Love, Druuna Diva, Lauryn May, Lea Lazur, Jessica Girl, Veronica Sanches, Patrisha, Jessica, and Bob the Terminator. Yes, that's his real porn name. Bitchin' huh?

· Woodman Entertainment (wood-ent.com)

Nuts Cover Girls: Getting The Babes Back Together [This Week In Lad Mags]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 12:30:22 EDT

If you like Nuts magazine, but don't like, you know ... magazines, then we have the solution for you: instead of running down to the newsstand or mailbox every week to see if your favorite model has made the cover of your favorite lad mag, you can just visit their new Cover Girls website where all the most popular girls are ready and waiting for your sticky-fingered perisal. You'll find photo and video galleries for all the chirpiest birds including Lucy Pinder, Sophie Howard, Eva Wyrwal, Lindsey Strutt and other usual suspects—with absolutely no dangerous staples or paper cuts to worry about! Convenience, simplicity and lots and lots of boobs. That's internet efficiency at its best.

· Nuts Covergirls (nuts.co.uk)

Not being particular fans of women's basketball, ... [Amateur]

Fleshbot — Fri, 16 May 2008 12:22:51 EDT

Not being particular fans of women's basketball, we don't know (or care) whether these photos are in fact ones of a member of the Niagra University women's basketball team. We do know, however, that they're naked pics of a pretty hot amateur babe who happens to have some basketball posters displayed on the walls in her room ... and that's good enough for us. (donchavez.com/blog; view uncensored photos here)

The latest entry in PETA's campaign to give ... [Activism]

Lux Nightmare — Fri, 16 May 2008 12:05:55 EDT

The latest entry in PETA's campaign to ~~give the world free porn~~ save the animals is 2008 Australian Penthouse Pet of the Year Kobe Kaige, who urges us all to "Give Fur the Cold Shoulder." We're really attached to that vintage ermine laprobe we use when we're sitting here trawling for stuff to write about, but ... anything for you, Kobe. (news.yahoo.com)

Everything You Wanted To Know About "Sex: How To Do Everything" [Book Review]

Lux Nightmare — Fri, 16 May 2008 11:50:23 EDT

Given the fact that we here at Fleshbot try to cover as many bases as possible—and despite that first person plural voice we insist on using most of the time—it's not too surprising that our editorial staff finds itself experiencing a difference of opinion every now and then. (For example: some of us crave the newfangled taste of a ass smoothie, while others are only satisfied by a classic dirtpipe milkshake). Our latest object of disagreement is the new coffee table extravaganza by "self-proclaimed Emily Posts of the modern bedroom" Em and Lo, "Sex: How To Do Everything", and not just because we fought amongst ourselves for a first look when the review copy arrived at Fleshbot Central: while some of us were immediately won over by the beautiful pictures and lovely layout, others were left a little limp on the whole project. Read some of our pros and cons (and get a peek at some of those photos) after the jump.

Pro: With page after page of beautiful photography by celebrated British erotica/fashion photographer Rankin and a nicely designed layout, this is a sex-related coffee table book that's actually sexy. You might even be tempted to leave it on your coffee table when company comes over—which, given the sad state of sex education in this country, would probably be a good thing.

Con: Those photos might be beautiful and all, but despite some attempt at racial diversity they get pretty homogenous after a while (and not just because everyone is heterosexual): the models are uniformly young and pretty and slender, and we know there are more than just young and pretty and slender people who have sex. It's like overdosing on an endless lowfat Pinkberry sundae: all that trendy, bland sweetness can get pretty cloying. Give us those dumpy, hairy hippies in "The Joy Of Sex" any day.

Pro: It's a fun read. Em and Lo have made their names with friendly and honest advice, so it's no surprise that their signature tone and sense of humor is present in this book. If you somehow thought that sex books always had to be dry, boring, and technical, this is a book to change your mind.

Con: About those pictures again? Playful as they are, they're also pretty darn tepid for a sex manual: there are naked boobs galore, but except for a purely anatomical shot or two you have to look long and hard for a glimpse of a dick—never mind a hard dick or even the barest hint of penetration. We know they're aiming for "tasteful", but a sex book without actual sex in it starts looking sort of like an American Apparel catalog. (Minus the apparel, of course.)

Pro: It's extensive. After so many years in the sex advice business, Em and Lo have amassed a lot of expertise about what makes people tick (and moan and sigh), and they share a tremendous amount of that knowledge here. With nine detailed sections, they leave almost no stone unturned. Hey, a book that devotes an entire section to handjobs and an exhaustive guide to the different kinds of sex toys on the market these days must have something to teach you.

Con: Encyclopaedic as it might be, it's hard to tell just exactly who this book is supposed to be for. If you're already sexually active, it's unlikely you're going to interrupt a session with your (probably white and slender) partner to look up a new position or learn how to put on a condom, and if you're not already having sex with someone ... well, wouldn't a book like this be sort of frustrating and/or besides the point? And as for people on either side of that fence who just want a resource for general sex advice and resources: there's this cool thing called the interweb where you can look up pretty much anything you like (including plenty of Em & Lo's archived material), won't cost you $25, and won't get sticky when you spill lube all over it. (Unless you spill it on your keyboard, in which case you're probably beyond the help of whatever a book like this could tell you anyway.)

So there you have it. Now excuse us while we get back to arguing about who gets to take the book home with them over the weekend. (Hey, at least we agreed that the pictures were pretty.)

· Buy "Sex: How To Do Everything" (amazon.com)
· Em and Lo (dailybedpost.com)
· Photos by Rankin (rankin.co.uk)

We were okay with "Not The Bradys XXX," and ... [Hype]

Lux Nightmare — Fri, 16 May 2008 11:10:47 EDT

We were okay with "Not The Bradys XXX," and even "This Ain't The Munsters XXX" — but srsly, "Not Mr. Rogers XXX Neighborhood"? Every time you think there are no more lines to be crossed, porn finds a way. (avn.com)

In the latest issue of Scientific American, ... [Sexy Science Corner]

Lux Nightmare — Fri, 16 May 2008 11:00:37 EDT

In the latest issue of Scientific American, scientists peer inside the brain to check out what goes on during orgasm, and the results will blow your ... er, never mind. Now that's some deep penetration. (sciam.com via BoingBoing; thumbnail from Squirting Carly)

Mette Th13teen Goes Both Ways [Crush Object Alert]

Lux Nightmare — Fri, 16 May 2008 10:50:57 EDT

We're not completely sure how we're supposed to pronounce her name (Ththirteenteen?), but that hasn't stopped us from falling for the beguiliging Mette Th13teen. A Danish model and photographer, she knows how to work it both in front of and behind the camera—and we all know just how hot a little versatility can be. Add in her hot tattoos, smarts, and the fact that she has a Hello Kitty guitar, and well — someone stop us before we forget how to pronounce our own name.

· Th13teen - alt. model & photographer (th13teen.net)
· AltPorn Feature: Mette Th13teen (altporn.net)

Precious isn't just a way of describing this ... [Babes]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 10:45:07 EDT

Precious isn't just a way of describing this model ... it's totally her name! Precious Adona actually, which makes her sound like a superhero or a character from Greek mythology. That why we changed our middle name to Adorable. (dailypoa.com, more @ fleshasiadaily.com)

If you're looking for a tourist destination ... [World Of Peen]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 10:22:53 EDT

If you're looking for a tourist destination this summer, may we recommend the Icelandic Phallological Museum? It may sound silly, but can you think of a better use of your time on Iceland than a stop at the penis museum? (reuters.com + ismennt.is - thanks Tits)

A semi-authentic biergarten in Brooklyn is ... [This Week In Gropings]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 09:59:57 EDT

A semi-authentic biergarten in Brooklyn is getting rid of its sexy, dirndl-clad waitresses (or their outfits anyway) because drunk and horny patrons couldn't keep their hands off them. It the grabby ones who always ruin it for everybody else. (timeout.com - thanks Jared)

Jean Laconia's Third Time [Sort-of-new Faces]

Gram Ponante — Fri, 16 May 2008 09:30:25 EDT

By now you know the premium placed on novelty in the porn industry, and nothing is more beautiful (at least in terms of a QuickBooks entry) than the first time a starlet is captured in flagrante on camera. And though we have found that young Jean Laconia told three separate directors on three different days that the scene she shot for them was her first, we realized that we don't care; Let her say that. Maybe it's her thing. Maybe the next big fetish will be Girls Who Say It's Their First Time But It Really Isn't. We'd watch Jean Laconia restock our Sparkletts cups.

Vivid's "Brand New Faces" series prides itself on finding people who are absolutely porn virgins, and director B. Skow several times asks Laconia if she is, in fact, brand new.

"This is the first time your pussy has been seen on camera?" he asks (she had just returned from Las Vegas where she shot this, and in Long Island the year before had shot this).

"Yes," she said.

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Don't lie to me."

"I'm not!"

In a pre-scene interview, Laconia demonstrates several devastating money retrieval techniques she employs as a stripper, all of which involve subterfuge and cunning ("I tell them they can take my bra off and it usually takes them three or four songs to do it")

But unless Laconia actually tries to steal our busfare and drink our milkshake, she can get away with anything she wants.

· Vivid (vivid.com)
· Buy "Brand New Faces 7" (gamelink.com)/a>

"Victims!" Is Not By Andrew Lloyd Webber (But It's Just As Gay) [Porn Of The Moment]

sturtle — Fri, 16 May 2008 09:25:42 EDT

We don't know what the folks at Eurocreme have against twinks, but they really seem to enjoy beating the crap out of them. Not that we're complaining, mind you: sure, our sylphlike interns might complain (especially the ones who can never seem to make coffee the way we like it), but not us. (Ed. note: anyone looking for an internship with a warm, cuddly porn blog company? We know someone who's "hiring"!)

For further evidence of Eurocreme's ongoing twink torture policy, check the box cover for the new BulldogXXX release "Victims!". Although the one-word exclamatory title might imply "Broadway spectacular!", the intimidating dildo and the look on Kai Cruz's face tell a different story: the closest Kai's gonna get to "jazz hands" is two fists up his tender young hole. Not exactly Sondheim material. Well, not his onstage material.

Now, some of us would like to believe that Eurocreme is actually empowering the world's twinks with all its butt-pillaging, binding, and shaving. (You know, the same way Tyra empowered "fat girls" on Wednesday night by selecting a size six as America's. Next. Top. Model.) And maybe that's the case. But if so, they need another copywriter to help get their point across. Note the DVD description, written by someone who has clearly never been a part of the "porn world" (whatever that is):

Life in the porn world is full of exciting sexual adventures, and for these horny fuckers, it's more about volunteers than victims!! Getting the photographer rock hard is the name of the game!

Despite the three non sequiturs in that tiny blurb, we're pretty sure Eurocreme's trying to say that Kai is volunteering for dildo annihilation, not being victimized by it. So rock on with your self-assumed victimhood, twinkish powerbottoms. (And make sure you bring us two packs of Splenda with our Ethiopian Yergacheffe next time.)

· "Victims!" (DVD info + previews @ eurocreme.com)

Hey, Kanye West—you've just performed ... [Spotted]

Fleshbot — Fri, 16 May 2008 09:20:26 EDT

Hey, Kanye West—you've just performed a sold out show in front of screaming thousands at Madison Square Garden! What are you gonna do now? "I'm going to play a set at a private party at a restaurant on the East Side surrounded by naked astronaut babes!" (Yeah, we figured Disneyworld was a little far to travel, not to mention the fact that it's been done already.) (brooklynvegan.com; photos via punkphoto.com)

Today's the last day to enter the second ... [Masturbation Celebration]

Lux Nightmare — Fri, 16 May 2008 09:15:14 EDT

Today's the last day to enter the second (=gay!) installment of our Sex or Masturbation Contest: leave your guesses in the comments by 5pm EST. Come on, you know you want to. (Or at least you want one of these.)

Sponsor Salad Toss [Sponsors]

Dashiell Bennett — Fri, 16 May 2008 09:10:52 EDT

Get on your knees and show some love to the sponsors who helped keep the flesh in Fleshbot this week:

· Adult Friend Finder
· Gay.com
· OhMiBod Music Powered Vibrator
· Streamate

Your name here: Advertise on Fleshbot!

Anneta Keys And The International Language Of Zucchini [Foodstuffs Of The Vagina]

Gram Ponante — Thu, 15 May 2008 21:20:23 EDT

Pierre Woodman's "The Perfectionist 2" arrived recently and we looked at the large back cover photo of Anneta Keys in a French Maid's outfit and thought, "Oui." It was only today that we discovered that the movie was recorded in Magyar (or something) and then dubbed in Spanish, so all we could figure out was "Trabajantes sexuales." But we didn't give up-Anneta gave us something everyone could understand.

"The Perfectionist 2" has something to do with languid and thin European women and spies and the Mafia. Then we meet Anneta. Why she is in an empty kitchen we don't know. Why the only food in an otherwise empty kitchen is a zucchini we don't know. So we made something up.

"I regard this zucchini with the same icy indifference with which I regard my men."

"I lick this zucchini with the same icy indifference with which I lick my men."

"I'm a French maid!"

"You'll do. Oh yes: you'll do. What was that line from 'Babe'? 'That'll do, Pig. That'll do.' Ha ha ha. 'A pig who thinks he's a dog.' This is a zucchini who thinks it's a cock."

"You're never fully dressed without a smile!"

"My friend gave me only one bottle (of PermaSoft), and now it's gone. Please, send me more Permasoft."

· Woodman Entertainment (wood-ent.com)
· Buy "The Perfectionist 2" (adultdvdempire.com)

Marital Aids Of The Future: Ryder Skye Gets Parts Engooped [You Are There]

Gram Ponante — Thu, 15 May 2008 20:20:02 EDT

The delightful Ryder Skye has had a cupcake batter-like substance (at least that's what I'd do) dumped on her in an attempt to strike a mold of her frame for the purpose of at-home mounting. As you can see from the photograph, the mixture was lovingly applied; there was probably a soprano saxophonist nearby, blowing slow over dusky rhythms.

Skye will be part of marital aid manufacturer Topco's Wildfire Celebrity Series, to be unveiled at January's AVN Expo.

"I am extremely excited to be molded by a top toy company like Topco," Skye said in a press release, which means she probably didn't say it. "They do amazing work and being associated with them has been a goal of mine that I'm very happy to achieve. I hope my fans have as much fun with this toy as I had making it."

While I don't doubt that getting batter dumped on you was not unpleasant, Ms. Skye, I really hope your fans have a much better time with this toy than you had making it. Otherwise there's nothing to keep them from just stripping naked and backing into some warm cookie dough (I understand Violet Blue does this), skipping the sex toy entirely.

But if the mold is done right, perhaps fans will get the same sensation Barrett Blade did with the actual Skye in "The Artist."

· Ryder Skye (ryderskye.com)
· Topco Sales (topcosales.us)
· Wicked Pictures (wickedpictures.com)
· Buy "The Artist" (gamelink.com)

Flesh Flicks: Call Waiting [Japan]

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 15 May 2008 17:50:57 EDT

Those crazy young folks and their cellphones—they just won't put them down for anything! Kids today can't live without the newfangled mobile technology that allows them to stay connected to their BFFs no matter where they are or what they're up to. They'd probably even "text" in the shower if those things were waterproof! (Which they might be! We don't even know because we're so old and square!) As you'll see in this clip this particular girl hangs up on no one, since her phone can perform pretty much every function one could ever need to survive. There is one burning question left unanswered though: Does she have threeway calling?

. . .

· "Japanese Phone Maniac" (RedTube)

* * * * *

Previously: Flesh Flicks Archives

International House Of Porn Tapes: Top Ten Amateur Videos From Around The World [Amateur]

Lux Nightmare — Thu, 15 May 2008 17:30:49 EDT

One of the nicest things about the interweb is that it allows us easy access to porn from all around the globe—and with all those user-generated video sharing sites out there these days, that also means an easy way to peek into the bedrooms of horny amateur exhibitionists everywhere. Because we're globally minded, we've scoured the offerings at video sharing site YuVuTu and rounded up some of the hottest amateur porn clips from ten different countries. (Or at least ones submitted by users in ten different countries, which is close enough.) Now you can find out the answers to some of life's most perplexing questions: Do the really French do it better? Or is the capital of amateur porn located in Luxembourg? Or maybe Mexico? Frankly, we don't care where it comes from, as long as it's hot. Hey, we just value diversity.

- - -

Mexico:

Zoey Andrews mi tipo de mujer

. . .

Germany:

Pantyhose/collant

. . .

Luxembourg:

petitecon Champagne Act

. . .

France:

Compilation : anal sex and wet pussy, my best orgasms and screams

. . .

Sweden:

Beach voyeur

. . .

Denmark:

Playing with my ass

. . .

Italy:

Grande orgasmo anale

. . .

Canada:

Close up wet and open pussy

. . .

Australia:

Blow job

. . .

USA:

Every Drop

· Yuvutu (yuvutu.com)

Erica Campbell: From Nude Model To Model Christian [Milestones]

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 15 May 2008 14:00:48 EDT

Pulling together our thrice-weekly Best of Babelogs feature will be slightly more difficult (and much less fun) since word came over the wire that busty glamour model Erica Campbell is putting her faith in the Lord and getting out of the nude modeling business. For the last couple of years, she's been one of the most familiar and ubiquitous faces on the babelog circuit, with shoots for Playboy, Penthouse, and other top online photo houses like Danni.com and Digital Desires under her belt. Unfortunately, as she explains on what used to be her membership website, she felt "lost" and "lonely" and "broken". But she's now filled that void inside her with Jesus Christ! From now on she will devote her days to rescuing animals—and rescuing other girls that she believes are trapped in the web of porn.

Of course, we would never criticize anyone for choosing to do whatever will make them happy, even if we tend to have a few issues with the whole skin-star-finding-religion thing. But we will say that we're sorry to see her go: Erica was one of our favorites, combining supervixen sexiness with cute girl-next-door looks, and she will be missed. On the other hand, since pictures of fellow former glamour model Crissy Moran are almost as popular now as they were two years ago when she found God and dropped out of the business, we're guessing that we'll still be running into Erica for a little while longer. Here's another look back at the works she left behind.

. . .

· "The Only Way Out" (clubericacampbell.com)
· Nude Model Erica Campbell Retires After Religious Conversion (avn.com)
· Erica Campbell Galleries via kellyfind.com, toteme.com, hpornstars.com, asredas.com + thousandbabes.com
· Erica Campbell Stripping (RedTube)

* * * * *
Previously: Crissy Moran Finds Jesus

And in domestic surveillance news this ... [Google]

Lux Nightmare — Thu, 15 May 2008 13:40:14 EDT

And in domestic surveillance news this week... be careful where you flash your tits, because Google Maps is watching. (Actually we'll be watching too, but you don't have to worry about us archiving your boobs in our database for posterity. Unless they're really nice boobs.) (Gawker)

Despite all the protestations from outraged ... [Advertising]

Fleshbot — Thu, 15 May 2008 13:20:50 EDT

Despite all the protestations from outraged viewers in the comments (e.g. "This is most likely the worst piece of advertising ever made!"), this (alleged*) Austrian ad for Playstation 3 makes perfect sense to us ... even if it makes us realize we don't need to buy a Playstation to have ourselves a good time. After all, if some of us are already equipped with a multi-function joystick, why spend a couple of hundred bucks for another one? (adsoftheworld.com - thanks Mike)

Sexploitation Clip Of The Week: "Prostitutes Protective Society" [Video]

Dashiell Bennett — Thu, 15 May 2008 13:10:37 EDT

Do you remember that part in "Sin City" where the prostitutes took over an entire section of town, kicked out the pimps and the cops and the mafia, and started dispensing their own brand of justice to anyone foolish enough to mess with their sisters? That's a true story! Here's the documentary proof to show that no organized crime syndicate is a match for a fiesty band of hookers who know how to talk tough and shoot a gun. (It's also Chapter 5 of this book.) By the way, people love to complain that there is too much nudity and violence in the movies—but have you noticed that no one ever complains about "nude violence"? The more, the better as far as we're concerned.

· P.P.S. - Prostitutes Protective Society (1966) (imdb.com)
· Clip courtesy of Bedazzled Blue (bedazzledblue.com)

Previously: Sexploitation Clip Archive

"Chitty Chitty Gang Bang": Chuck Palahniuk Goes Deeper Into Cassie Wright [Great Moments In Marketing]

Violet Blue — Thu, 15 May 2008 12:50:15 EDT

With the imminent release of "Fight Club" author Chuck Palahniuk's book "Snuff" it's never been more clear to us that (a) his marketeers have some really excellent drug connections, and (b) Palahniuk's obsession with fictional aging porn star Cassie Wright is as surreal as his novels. After the awesome fake retro "Wizard Of Ass" trailer comes "Chitty Chitty Gang Bang", another wacky sendup of classic porn tropes complete with bad dialogue, scary sound effects and ridiculous scenarios. Which is nothing like real porn, of course. (Maybe it's better?)

Still, to get the full effect of the Palahniuk's book (whose title may or may not give away the ending), one only need look at the author's bizarre "interviews" with present-day Cassie Wright to realize that being in a Palahniuk novel might just be like being inside his actual brain. Watch the faux "Chitty Chitty Gang Bang" trailer below, plus a video where Palahniuk himself interviews a Divine-inspired Cassie Wright as she reveals how "Chitty Chitty" was her "chance to do real acting". (Ed note: So why hasn't anyone made a real porn movie called "World Whore 3: The Whore To End All Whores" anyway?)

. . .

Fake trailer: "Chitty Chitty Gang Bang"

. . .

Chuck Palahniuk Interviews Cassie Wright, part 1:

· Cassie Wright (myspace.com)
· Chuck Palahniuk (chuckpalahniuk.net)
· "Snuff" by Chuck Palahniuk (Amazon)

The Perfect Kiss? [Video]

Fleshbot — Thu, 15 May 2008 12:48:49 EDT

Sure, you might think being flexible and hung enough to practically deep throat your own dick like Aussie wonder hot_potato85 here would be the best thing ever, but have you ever considered how lonely it must be to spend all those nights alone in your bedroom without anyone to so much as lick your balls every once in a while? (Wait, he can do that too? We just lost our last reason not to be jealous. Never mind.)

. . .

· hot_potato85 (Xtube profile, via dudetubeonline.com)

Brian Surewood Motor Tragedy Heads For Arraignment [News]

Gram Ponante — Thu, 15 May 2008 12:45:58 EDT

In October of last year pornstar Brian Surewood was the other driver in what has been alternately described as a road rage, street racing, or reckless driving incident that killed a young boy and severely injured two members of his family. The discovery period of his trial completed yesterday and while expert testimony found him not at fault in causing the accident the charges against him still stand; he will be arraigned in two weeks and if convicted he faces a prison term of 25 years to life. (avn.com)